Home Improvement
by xamnam
Summary: With Torhu away for the day, things don't quite stay the same at Shigure's house. A no plot one shot...


Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket but, the Natsuki Takaya-san does. The only part of this story that I own is the idea, and some liberties I took with the constructions of Shigure's house.

Author's Note: Why I wrote this, is that I've only written one fic on this account and that last one was a year or two ago, and I just needed something to write. Why it is so cracked out, is that as is custom with me, the concept, rough, and final versions of this story were all done at 2 am. Please don't try to look for a plot; you will just confuse your self. Just enjoy the sleep deprived oddness. Anyways, please review and critique.

Dedicated: To Amy, as she is the one who told me to write this one shot fic, and the only one up at 2 am. This is also dedicated to spelling errors, such as the Kozi Fush

**Home Improvement**

Shigure sighed softly as he finished the last paper square for his door. He set the door lightly back into its frame, and slid it back, enjoying the cool autumn breeze.

"I really wish those boys would stop destroying my poor house. Akito cut off money for repairs a while ago, and I'm almost out of supplies." No sooner had the words left his mouth than a crash was heard outside. "But no," he whined softly to himself, "the gods see fit to punish me." He sat, unperturbed, as Kyou flew past inches from his head and into the wall behind him.

"K...kuso nezumi," the orange topped youth muttered, as he tried to separate himself from the wrecked wall. He got up slowly and spit some traces of blood from his mouth.

"You're paying for the repairs, you know that, right?" Kyou paid this no attention as he rushed back outside, trying to find his rival. "Of course not. It's just as well that Tohru is spending the weekend at one of her friend's house. Those two have been fighting worse than ever the past month." He glanced passingly at the destroyed wall, and the waiting computer. "Hmmm, more repairs, or work on my next manuscript. My deadline was only last week, so I don't need to work on my manuscript for a little while, but I really am tired of the constant maintenance." With that, he took a sheet of paper, wrote "Under Construction, and hung it where the wall used to be.

"That's better. Now, where did Mit-chan place my kite?" As he wandered off, bits of plaster from the ceiling cracked off and fell into the pile of debris. Kyou could hear Shigure's pathetic attempts to find the kite from the roof, as he was nursing his wounds.

"Does he really think calling to it is going to help him find it?" Every now and then, a call of Kite-san would drift up from the house. "That idiot, doesn't he remember his editor burned it last time she was here," Kyou thought angrily. Still annoyed about his fight with Yuki, he kicked the decorative ceramic tiles off the edge of the roof, enjoying the sound the made as they fell quickly to the ground. It wasn't long before the entire rooftop was devoid of the tiles.

Down in the kitchen Shigure was now badgering Yuki about the kite, unable to find it on his own. "Are you sure you haven't seen it? I could have sworn I left it hidden in the closet," Shigure whined.

"For the last time, I have not seen your kite. Now please quit asking me." With that, Yuki started to head upstairs. Shigure was not far behind.

"Are you sure? Maybe in a moment of boredom, you seized my wonderful kite, and played with it, yet forgot to replace it?" Yuki turned around, and confronted his elder.

"I have not seen your kite. Now leave me alone!" Yuki started to walk away, but under the weight of both Sohmas, the floor suddenly gave way, sending them falling. Yuki glared at Shigure as he disentangled himself from the wreckage.

"You know its funny how without any support underneath, floor is greatly weakened," Shigure mused.

"What do you mean, without any support? Wasn't there a wall here?"

"There was, until Kyou decided to collide with it during your fight." He looked up at the newly made hole, as Yuki stormed off outside. "More repairs, and still no kite…" Shigure slowly got up, and wandered off towards the kitchen. As he entered, Kyou was cooking soup on the stove. "Yum, it smells wonderful Kyou, how much of it did you save for your wonderful Shigure"

"None!" Kyou spun around and faced Shigure. "You want your own food, make it yourself!"

"Uh, Kyou...," Shigure started.

"No, you aren't getting any, and none of your whining is going to help!"

"I just thought you might want to know that your shirt is on fire." Kyou's shirt had rested upon the stove as he spun to face Shigure, and it was now giving off smoke as fire started to consume it. Kyou ripped the shirt off and threw it, only to have it land on the stove and become even more engulfed in fire. Both Shigure and Kyou were frantically searching for a fire extinguisher. During their search, the wall slowly caught fire, until the general area around the stove was ablaze. Kyou finally found the extinguisher, and doused the flames.

Shigure walked ever towards the stove. "Do you still want this shirt," Shigure asked as he held up the ragged remnants of Kyou's shirt. Pieces of it flaked off as it fell to the ground. "Oh, and your ramen looks quite sumptuous, are you sure I can have any?" He held up the pan, with what few scorched noodles that were left falling out of the pan.

Kyou simply glared at Shigure. "Just leave me alone, you idiot!" He walked angrily up the stairs. A couples seconds later, a thud was heard. Kyou's voice resounded through the house. "Why is there a hole in the floor?"

Shigure smirked and walked up the stairs. He went to the hole in the floor, and looked down at the boy entangled in the rubble. "Meant to warn you about that." He walked carefully around the hole, and left Kyou fuming below.

Meanwhile, Yuki walked into the kitchen with a basket of vegetables from his garden. As he turned, he noticed the charred scene that had occurred. "What happened here?" He wondered aloud.

"Nothing, nothing happened," came the joint reply from throughout the house. Yuki was nonplussed as to how they could cause the damage. Kyou walked into the kitchen, brushing rubble from his clothes, his torso scraped from his fall.

The silver haired youth glanced over at the entrant. "I assume you had something to do with this," he said, with a smirk.

"Shut up, you damn rat!" Kyou stormed out, kicking his way through one of the doors leading outside. Yuki watched as he munched on a carrot.

"Shigure is not going to be happy about that," he said thoughtfully.

"What won't I be happy about," Shigure questioned as he carefully came down the stairs.

"That." Yuki gestured towards the torn door.

"Another door? Why me, why my poor house?" Shigure collapsed into one of the chairs. "It seems that not a day passes when some damage isn't done to my house." Behind him, the already damaged door collapsed to the floor. "See? Alas, that is all that I can take today. I am off to bed." He moaned heavily.

"Cheer up; maybe things won't look so bad in the morning."

"One can only hope." Shigure walked up the stairs, careful to avoid the wreckage along the way.

Yuki looked at the rampant damage surrounding him and sighed. "It doesn't seem right to leave this mess for Torhu to come home to tonight." He walked over to the collapsed door, and set it loosely back in its frame. Leaning down, he started to clear the mess from the floor. He lifted a large piece of debris, and tossed to the side. At that moment, Kyou walked into the house, and was hit in the chest by the detritus. He was pushed into the wall, and leveled one of the supports for the ceiling. Large pieces of plaster started to fall, hitting both boys. They both fell into the rubble, unconscious.

Later that night, Tohru arrived back at the house. She looked back and waved at Hana and Uo as they drove off. "I'll see you at school!" She walked towards the house, excited to be near Yuki and Kyou again. As she approached the front door, she noticed the tear in the front door.

"Oh, Yuki and Kyo must have fought again." However, as she tried to slide open the door, it fell to the ground. "Ah! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to knock over the door! I'm sorry, I'm sorry…." Slowly she recognized the two boys beneath the pieces of ceiling.

"Ah! Yuki, Kyou! Are you ok?" She frantically tried to dig the two out, to little avail. Finally, after a while, she managed to unearth Yuki and Kyou and raised them to consciousness.

"Are you two ok? I just came in and found you two below the rubble. I'm sorry if it's any way my fault. Oh it probably was, I probably forgot to…"

"No, its ok Torhu, it isn't your fault. I was just cleaning, until this idiot got in the way and broke the support," supplied Yuki as he cleaned off his clothes.

"What? I was just walking in, and you throw a huge piece of plaster at me! It's not my fault," yelled Kyou, jumping to his feet.

"Well, if you had had the common sense to watch where you were going to, we wouldn't have gotten in this mess, baka neko." At the remark, Kyou lunged for Yuki, but missed, and hit another support, splintering it. "Honda-san, we should move away, he has weakened the ceiling even more and…" They scrambled away as the ceiling started to give out. The two had barely gotten out of the way before Shigure and his bed came crashing down through the new hole.

"Well, that's it, a perfect end to a perfect day," Shigure announced without sitting up. "My bed comes crashing through the floor, and the rest of the house is already destroyed. That's it; I'm done for the day. Whatever else happens, handle it yourself. Yuki, things had better look better in the morning, like you said" Without another word, Shigure curled up and went back to sleep. Kyou's voice was a muffled groan beneath the mattress.

"Well, one thing is certain now," Torhu announced with seriousness in her voice.

"What's that Honda-san?"

"Simple, I can't leave you three alone in the house anymore."


End file.
